Oakland and playoffs in the same sentence

     My first child will be named Yoenis. Cuban or not. Regardless of gender. Okay, maybe not but hey, who doesn't love the Cuban defector? Every PLAYOFF team needs a star they can rely on. Wait, did I just say PLAYOFFS and mention an Oakland team in the same column? I was starting to put more confidence in the Mayans ballsy prediction than face the brutal truth that an Oakland team would never again reach the PLAYOFFS. I thought we would need to take Jon Gruden out of retirement, give him a pension off his painful QB Camp and rely on another 'Big Hurt' in order for Oakland to again be relevant. You aren't relevant unless you are a playoff team... sorry Kings!
     What separates the Cowboys, Marlins and Magic from the A's? Although these fans may have worn a paper bag over there head, been ashamed at times and even questioned their loyalty, at least they have huge, monstrous, flashy structures to hide behind. What do we have in Oakland? Not a 'ballpark' per-say, it can't be titled a 'stadium', I will entitle it with it's much deserved nickname--a concrete gloomy slab. That's on a good day! It looks like a civil war bunker... not a venue that should be supporting a PLAYOFF baseball team. For the first time, bay area residents may no longer be embarrassed about this bunker, because although it may look like a giant quarry, we produced a PLAYOFF baseball team! Suck on that Marlins. And you too, Cowboys. Isn't it ironic the bay area has the only municipal facility supporting two professional sports teams? Maybe it will humble the bay area folk a little, well maybe not. I'm just dreaming.
     Anyhow, back to sports. The Oakland A's. Wow, wow, wow! How cool is it that the so-called 'dream team' that are the Angels have been horrible (by LA standards) all year. They had the off-season of a lifetime. Signing the most prized possession of the decade in Albert "shove it up your" Pujols. Bringing in the long lost beach boy, CJ Wilson and trading for Mr. anxiety himself, journeyman Zack Grienke. It was an off-season that was supposed to again bring a world series back to LA and exempt one of the newly added wild-card spots to the Rangers. As an Athletics fan, this brought dismay and clouded any hope I had for the season. The thoughts of teamwork, chemistry and clutch hits no longer danced in my head the same way sugar plums do in December, instead I was blinded by the flashy acquisitions and monopoly money the Angels were throwing around. The Rangers had made the previous 2 world series and although they had pulled a Lebron "choke" James, they were poised for another run in October. The Angels of course went from the team by Disneyland to a world series favorite and the rest of the AL was just as stacked. The Tigers brought in another overweight infielder to add to the already 'loaded' roster (no pun intended). With Miggy and Prince the Tigers looked as if they were going to run away with the division. After all, they still had the best pitcher in the league. As long as the chubby brothers were hitting, they would win. The East provided us with the Yankees, about as much of a lock to make the world series as Meryl Steep to be nominated for an Oscar. The Rays, baseball's sweethearts were young and again looking to take advantage of a late season run. A Baltimore team, who may be getting more publicity from KeegansKickoff if it weren't for the team out in Oakland. And, how about those Red Sox? Bill Simmons, hold back the tears. All I know about that team now is Bobby V. needs to go. Listening to Sox fans complain about their season is like listening to John Mayer complain about his love life. It needs to stop! Boston's dysfunctional nature is another  time, another day, another beer in the dugout topic away.
     Well, if nothing else, this year all baseball fans learned three things. (1) The baseball Gods are real. The A's, Orioles and Nationals are in the playoffs while the Red Sox, Angels, Magic Johnson's project (Dodgers) and the Marlins (have we ever seen more unneeded hype instilled on a team?) are all out of the playoffs. It was a year in which we witnessed the White Sox and Pirates become relevant. A year in which the Royals finished with a better record than the Red Sox (insert John Mayer joke here) and the Dodgers traded away talented prospects for 3 chicken wings, 2 french fries and a water cup (Beckett, Gonzalez, Crawford) oh, and $250 million dollars. And provided Boston with a RESET button. What a wild year. (2) The NL means nothing. The AL is the elite power. The NL is like Wiz Khalifa, Mac Miller and Drake, while the AL sticks with the proven, talented Jay-Z, Dre, Tupac. The AL is elite, the NL is in their shadow. I'm not convinced the Nationals are more than a Stephen Starsburg, Bryce Harper hyped club, that the Reds are more than a product of the weakest division in baseball and that the Giants have rode the likes of a cheater, catcher should-be first baseman and a goofy Pence all year long. If the Angels, White Sox, Rays and Blue Jays were all dropped into the NL they would be competing for the playoffs. The best team in the NL is the Atlanta Braves, mark my words. Don't sleep on the Cardinals either. (3) Paper means nothing. If paper meant everything, in fact, anything the playoff teams would look like this: Rangers, Angels, Tigers, Red Sox, Yankees; Dodgers, Cardinals, Phillies, Giants, Marlins. Wow, not nearly as exciting is it? So throw away the paper, expectations and predictions the same way we all did last March after Norfolk St. beat Duke. Go ahead, crumble up your expectations, your realistic predictions and burn them with the same lighter you used to light your Lebron James Cleveland jersey. I have been puzzled, excited and ultimately squandering over this whole season. The NL Cy Young is about to be awarded to a 37 year old knuckleballer named R.A. Dickey. The apocalypse may be happening right before our eyes. Moneyball is again relevant, the Baltimore Orioles are leading the AL East over the Red Sox and Yankees, the AL MVP may not even go to the triple crown winner, but rather a rookie on a team that won't even make the postseason and an Oakland team is in the PLAYOFFS. I'm convinced, no longer do Vegas sports odds matter. No Shwami says or the sports guru predictions are spot on and not even the great John Clayton is correct anymore. What is the sports world coming to? Who knows, but I love it, i'm just enjoying the ride.