Well, this past week/weekend was the best week/weekend of my life (so far). Of all the teams I saw play in Salt Lake this past week, Wichita St. wins the "Tim Mcgraw in The Blind Side" performance award. This award is given to the team who catches us all by surprise and has us asking...Who is that again????
Can we start giving Wichita State some credit? ESPN tells us that all Wichita St. did was beat a sloppy "Bottom of the barrel" Big East team and the "Most overrated #1 seed of all time!" First off, Gonzaga didn't play bad against the Shockers, they struggled defensively, but Kelly Olynyk had the best game Canada has ever seen. Wichita State was hot the whole game and they are a tough, tough rebounding team. Gonzaga didn't lose that game, Wichita State beat them.
For about the 7th straight year, my bracket is worse than yours. My only claim to fame is that I have all Final Four teams left and I have Tom "It is only a matter of time until I single handed-ley blow a game" Crean losing to Syracuse in the Sweet Sixteen. After witnessing the second/third round madness live from press row, my couch and the underrated March Madness App, I have taken notes on notes on notes and here is what I transcribed:
....There are 17 members of Harvard's band. A.K.A 17 future Goldman Sachs employees. 16 of the 17 band geeks maintain a 4.0+ GPA. The 17th reigns from Brazil and is following in Fab Melo's footsteps.
....5 of the 8 Harvard "cheerleaders" wear glasses.
....I wrote down 12 more Harvard band/"cheer squad"/fan jokes.
....Kelly Olynyk is the Beach Boys' long lost Canadian brother.
....I believe Kelly Olynyk deserves to be a lottery pick. I can see it now: "Wigs sold out at (insert lottery team)'s home games"
....Did anyone else watch Bill Simmons and friends stream a show live from The Sports Guy's house? Here is a quick recap (picture) of the show:
1.) Bill Simmons is the man!
2.) Is that Andre 3000 next to Bill?
3.) Why was Jalen Rose holding a baseball bat the WHOLE show?
4.) Good thing Jalen and "we will call him" Andre 3000 weren't next to each other on the couch....
5.) How many meatballs did Joe House eat?
Grantland, I love the creativity and applaud trying to bring back the wood baseball bat and make Andre 3000 relevant again, but this just didn't work. It became the Bill Simmons-Jalen Rose show. Seriously, why wasn't David Jacoby on that couch???? If it is a couch for 4, then why invite Andre 3000????
1.) Is that a butterfly affected by radiation on his head?
2.) Why not insert Jay-Z as half of the "mystery" face behind those bifocals?
3.) Isn't 20/20 also the probability of Gonzaga losing before the elite eight? (Too soon Zags?)
4.) When are the parody's of "Suit and Bow-Tie" coming out?
I have a few critiques of JT's comeback: Why wasn't Beyonce featured in any of his songs? Is anyone trending more than her? Also, why no "Janet Jackson Half-Time Performance" lyrical references?
What Kelly Olynyk is thinking in this picture:
1.) "Did I leave my 72 oz. Garnier Fructis in my locker or at the hotel?"
2.) "Adam Sandler had a real debate going on: What is more important, shampoo or conditioner?"
3.) "Oh crap! That is my barber. I made a reservation 7 months ago and never showed up. Just keep your head down, Kelly!"
4.) "Seriously though, what is a Shocker?"
I can't resist anymore:
Top ten moments of PMP street ball. (no technical fouls this time)
ReplyDelete1. Spencer dashing for the ball and trips and falls. The knee once so fresh was loaded in blood and his number one worry was “oh no it got on my garments!” That is pre missionary on a mission.
2. Energy drink promoters. Please don’t try and promote us a drink that sponsors the PHOENIX SUNS. It gets worse the guy that was selling made the best quote “man I am not even smart I failed all my classes last semester.” Great influence just precious.
3. Darby Clutch!!! Enough to say after a game of PIG using just P goes on for days!
4. Hookshot over Jared to beat the KOD. Style points and an odor of Jared or should I say the new Macklemore.
5. Dress code. Blake in jeans? Color changing Nikes? Sweatshirt with stripes? What is this an episode of Jailbreak? One word P.A.T.H.E.T.I.C
6. Half court marks the spot. Keegan Darby with a 5-0 shot streak. I looked up and I thought I honestly saw Mr. Stephen Curry. I was ready to change my Bollywood shirt to Got Kod?
7. Dribbling and an intentional lazy turnover. Do I need to name a name or do we all know who dribbled and was tired and just gave up.
8. 100% from the free throw line. PJ please you need to stop I am sure I saw some scouts from Gonzaga trying to find a real player to get them away from upsets.
9. Josh Barker’s run for the ball on the grass and slipping. How he didn’t fall I have no idea but it must be from all that hip hop practice.
10. The game finishing assist. Blake’s through the legs pass over to PJ with a fade from half court. The tension in the air and a swish to fill our ears and the PJ, Blake and Josh Barker Squad win all 3. Ladies and gentlemen a day of pure style, beauty and hand behind the head lay ups.
#7 has to be blake. No wonder he can't dribble with that outrageous outfit he was wearing.
ReplyDeleteHow is the comment, "Parker, was that my assist?" not included in the Top 10???? We were playing 3 on 3 street ball and a member of the winning team (you can guess who it is) asks if he got the assist...Selfish? Try-Hard? or just plain goofy?
ReplyDelete